While reading this entry, a tought crossed my mind: what MBTI type personality must Erkka be? xD This tought crossed my mind because I share similar feelings/behavior regarding social interactions, and the train situation and social approach made me remeber myself. For a long time I had problems and complex accepting my out of norm social approach, because I was allways a lot introverted, and when I need to social interact it is to me like an dificult challenge and it take it like an experiment to learn it better, I allways feel like I am inside my brain in a deep distant room/field, watching and interacting to people from a distance, not fully there, and I prefer 80% of time solitude. One day I read about the MBTI test (it is like a chart that divides people in 16 personality types - it is like astrology psychology version, made by Junge and his wife. This test is very famous on the internet, a lot of websites and youtube channels share things about it). I never liked this kind of approaches, to divide people in different types, because I think each one is unique. But this test result was very good to know myself, because it made me feel more normal, I realized that being introverted and feeling this social awkwardness was normal after wall, and there was more people like me. I steel think that each one is unique, but this kind of personality divisions test was handy to know more about me, by reading and thinking if it fits me or not I know more about my boundaries. My type resulted INFP out of the 16 types, I I think yours is close to that (INFT or close?). I wounder if you have done this test ever and know your type, only out of curiosity. Is ask this out of the blue dumb curiosity, only because I know that you read about psychology stuff and post it in your blog, so maybe you already know this, or you are interested, since you share similar social challeges as me. If you never done this test, here is an example: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
If you never read about this, give it a try, it is interesting, with me it was accurate and a good reflection, was good to know more about my social awkwardness and challenges xD
PS: That website is good for the test, but not the best for the description of each type of personality (to simple), if find this one better: http://www.personalitypage.com/html/index.shtml